Soccer = Big Queer Looking Douche Bags

Take a look at soccer players. Notice you'll pick out a lot of them saying you hate them. People you tell this to will say you hate them for no apparent reason. But guess who is wrong: THEM. You have a really good reason to hate a lot of soccer players.

You hate a lot of soccer players because it is full of pretty boys. Those are the kind of people that soccer prays on. If it wasn't for pretty boys from North America and the entire population of South America there would be no soccer now. But due to soccer we have a lot of lame soccer players. Girls just love them. I have no clue why. Neither does science. It is not pheromones either. It is something called On Earth Black Holes according to the national society against over aged soccer ( the organization says no one over the age of ten should be playing soccer. I agree). Due to the fact that soccer is not cool, all the pretty boys join the teams at a young age. Now girls are weirdly attracted to people who love uncool things such as soccer. These people date each other. This is why the awsome people like me and you hate soccer players.

Soccer is also the most boring sport except for curling, tennis and golf. These sports only entertain the players, not the audience. Which is a huge reason that people say that they hate soccer players. You have to have a problem to join a team the first place. Parents that enroll kids in soccer are monsters. The mothers are usually the worst. The fathers like the mother for looks only. MILF.
Soccer players are usually dicks. They think that they are better than everyone else. They think they are cool because girls follow them around. They really only like the girls as friends though because all of them are gay and it helps them stay in the closet. Once they come out they would no longer be cool enough to have friends. But people would also hate them because they are posers and posing to be straight wouldn't do them any justice. ALL SOCCER PLAYERS ARE POSERS.

Simplton

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Brian Maillard - DEMOnster

Get to the part thats in so far called Demonster. Its really awsome.

John Petrucci Psycho Exercises - The Secret Tape

This is uber funny

Megadeth - Tornado of souls (Live)

This an awesome song i discovered from watching rock fujiyama. This is when marty friedman was in megadeth.

Subliminal Ads and Generic Rich Families

I go through a food/ recipe book and it shows this family eating Italian food. It says embrace your inner Italian. But if you have no Italian blood how can you imbrace whats not there. Even a little counts but I guarentee that these folks are not Italian. They are a generic family surrounded by frames of a Kodak moment which brings us to the subliminal ad. The subliminal ad say to buy Kodak. Like on Seinfeld, look at the cereal boxes. Thats all you need to know.

But the generic family is easy to decipher. Here is a list of the things they do and like.

1. The girl would want an Ipod and would listen to complete garbage for music.

2. They would watch Hockey, American Idol and House or 24.

3. The kids get a lot of cash for their birthdays and their parents never say no.

4. The parents a drivers of an SUV and a small piece of crap Hyundai ( sorry)

5. Even though the mother seems to be an amazing cook by making all of this "great food" she probably has to buy the chocolate syrup for the dessert and the sauce for the pasta.

6. Their children are those kids that think that they are really good and really smart but in reality they are a bunch faggish noobs that are just asking to get a real huge black eye.

7. The grandfather is one of those stuck up old men.

8. The father plays golf.

9. The son is going to be a douche bag who always has a girlfriend and it is always one who could do better than him.

10. The mother has a lot of stupid reasons to do things. She never was all that bright in the first place.

11. These are the kind of people who sadly have friends and their friends are those kind of people you hate from appearence ( kind of like those people who always drive four wheelers and drink beer and watch NHL and talk a lot about sports).

12. The only rock bands they know are AC/DC and Nickelback, Rush is a band they only heard of and they never can name their songs and probably think they have a girl singer.

13. These people live in a town that is all rich residencial homes. It costs a lot but you can't really do anything there. You can't burn things because it sucks and the people there are probably to boring to burn things and the only time they think it is acceptable is when camping ( which is only allowed at a camp ground). The kids well turn to pot for a passtime when the near by malls get boring. This town is similar to Bedrock ( meaning Ford add it up noobs). ( Mad yet?)

14. These are the kind of people who think that you play acoustic guitar. Electric isn't a term associated with guitars. Then they expect you to automatically play friendly music and always Stairway to Heaven. They usually can't tell you who it is by and if you can't play it then you can't play guitar at all, your first impression is a bad one.

15. The daughter only dates a faggy looking soccer players.

16. 3/4 of the family are stuck up, big feeling retards. There is one nice one but they still think they are better but to a lesser extent than the rest.

17. By the time the son is 16 you will hate his guts for being himself. Don't blame him though. His miserable, backstabbing, Nissian driving parents taught him to be the shitbag of Bed^&(_.

18. The next town over is never as good as theirs. We will call this next town over Sackville. They refuse to associate with them. The other town over is usually poorer in financial situautions but are a douchey as the ones on this side of the white line.

As you can see. These people are pathetic rich snobs. Big business may keep you clean unlike the gross town over yonder ( they never use this word). But when you unload a big one after eating that mid eastern restaurant food and the bidget breaks down and you got no tp, you still smell like that thing you call homeless shit.

The Graffah

The Graffah is the best part of a laugh. Why? I don't know because it doesn't mean anything. You know that if I actually knew what Iwas talking about I'd be a lawyer for some awsome law firm. But what if...............

MARTY FRIEDMAN vs PAUL GILBERT

Its from a Japanese TV show. The cool part is when three guitar players have a contest of who can play riffs and guess the guitar player from the band. If they don't they drink a sick green goo.

This Guy is Messed Up

He talks about how Blind Guardian should make up a concept album about his idea of Krautasia.
In fact I believe he is obsessed with with saurkraut. Also obessed with the Bass Pro logo it makes him a creep.
This guy is not normal. He makes Benny Normal look normal. Thats sad. He is a terrible person who thinks up terrible things about others.
Also known as a moron that is highly intelligent but does not display such behavior. He is a real idiot most of the time. Also he is known to talk about his bathroom habits at the wrong time which is always.
He has some great friends who are belived to be social workers that are being paid off to hang out with him. Many people also believe he is going to have a foreign supermodel girlfriend someday. This has never yet happened so it is not proven and may never happen but many experts on him all agree that this may happen.
He has been known to have Super Powers that are equvilent to what Houdini would have if he was Harry Potter mixed with the coolness of Ron Howard. Most of these don't get used because people would be so blown away by the awsomeness of him that they'd die. Also they gov't won't let his super powers be exposed because they can power vechiles for twenty years with one fill up. Most of his super powers are unleased on his guitar. The only guitar that can stand up to his power at this moment is the Ibanez S series. The experts also say Fender Strats , Teles and Basses can do it along with Gibson Les Pauls and SG's.
All in all this guy shold be avoided by all people for health reasons. If you come in contact with him, plug your nose because he is known to smell and fart in three to five round bursts. This is his defense mechanism. If he is afraid of you he will do this. His fumes destroy brain cell and deteriorates spines. Please visit your doctor for the shot that will help prevent his sickness form passing on to you. ( Also available in a liquid and pill).

If Its Crisco Its Fat

Yeah thats about it, if I saw it I would too. Nice its uber nice looking. Its Nice. Whoop Whoop.
But your a fag trying to fit it in a shampoo bottle. And you stab back like you stick ass. and In Flames is awsome kinda like Iron Maiden or the monk of vidiland. MMmm nibs are a ripooff loike DQ. Leeches. Crazyljfkgfjgkfgjfgjfgjfkfdjgkgjfdkgjfdkgfjdkgjfdkjdgkfkgjfdkgjfkgjfdkgjfdkgjfdkgjfdgkfjfkg
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Mediterranean Sundance - Guitar Trio: Al Di Meola

from Monk